Well, it's 2020 a new dawn, a new decade, and we made it. Though at times it may not feel like we actually made it, we need to recognize that every little accomplishment is a milestone we should be proud of. When I sat down and really thought about what I have accomplished over the last year I did not feel particularly jazzed. I started to compare my life to what other people achieved and posted on their stories, statuses, and feeds. Quickly I felt even less impressed with my 2019, and that is the irony in this blog post. I don't think you should feel the need to share what you've accomplished, it's a personal feat and it does not need to be projected on the internet, but if you're really proud of what you have achieved then by all means post away. Just know that someone else's accomplishments are not your failures, and you have achieved so much more than you think. This anxiety of not feeling good enough is so common, and it has made me realize that my biggest accomplishment of 2019 was facing my fears daily, and pushing past them.
We all face fears, and we all choose to carry on and move forward, that is something to be proud of. If you feel like you accomplished very little in 2019, know that you accomplished what felt like the impossible in that moment, and you became a better person because of it. So put a glass up to 2020, and cheers to facing our fears, and becoming exactly who we want to be, because we can.
So you may be thinking, "That is a bit dramatic Mikayla, what fears do we face?" Well, think about it! Getting out of bed in the morning to start your day is absolutely terrifying. It's dark, cold, and your never ending to-do list weighs on you so heavily that sometimes it takes every last bit of energy to get out of bed. But, we do it, we put our sleepiest foot forward, slap on something pretty, drink a hefty cup of coffee, and start our day. Every day we take a risk, we put ourselves out there, we learn a lesson and grow, and it's uncomfortable. The fear of failing or not being good enough is a dark shadow that lingers around us, but we keep going. We keep learning, and growing, until we realize that it really is not that scary, and we are more than capable of handling these big (and small) tasks.
For me, the end of 2019 was probably the scariest thing I have done yet! I lost my job (I will not bore you again with those details, and no, I am not still bitter...) I moved to a city, the wonderful District of Columbia, and I put myself completely outside of my comfort zone. And what happened? The world didn't end, it honestly felt like it was beginning all over again! Now, I am not saying the cure to all of your problems is to quit your job and move, but sometimes taking a risk pays off. I went from dreading the 8 hours a day I had to sit and work at a company I hated, to smiling on my commute to a career that I love. I wasn't sure when I was in Charleston that leaving was the right choice, I wasn't sure if I was running away from my problems or expanding my horizons, but that's the thing. You can‘t know something for sure until you try. My point is, if I gave into my fears,I would not be in DC living my best life, I wouldn't have gone to The College of Charleston, and met the people I did and became the woman I am. The same goes for any decision I have made and for all of you. If you don't make the big choices, you won't know what you can become. Fears do nothing but hold us back, and I only want to push forward, so 2020 we are ending our fears and finding out what's next!
So what are your fears? Are you afraid to start that side project, ask for that promotion, go back to school, quit your job, or fall in love? Well good! You should be, all of those things have a chance of falling apart, but those moments, the moments that tear us down to our core, build who we eventually become. They make us stronger, and put us on a path to where we are meant to be. I know that this wave will not last forever, I am constantly battling the idea of waiting for the floor to collapse beneath me, and learning to ride the wave and appreciate the moment, but I will not give into my fears.
I will not slow down because I am scared, and you shouldn't either. We are all so much stronger than we think we are, we are all capable of so much more than we know, and we can all be whoever we want to be. You just have to keep trying, keep following your truth, and keep fighting your fears. The rest will work out along the way. Appreciate your lows, and ride your highs, it will all make sense one day. And promise yourself, if you don't accomplish anything else in 2020, acknowledge that you are strong enough to fight your daily fears, and that in itself is fabulous.
xoxo,
Failing Fabulously
Comentários